The Impatient Man

Patience must be a gift from God, so hard it is for a mortal to attain.

He spent much of his days locked up in his quarters, claiming supreme emotional control when really he was just running from the world. It’s easy to have faith when the water is still and the sun is shining. But true Godliness is found in the furnace of hell, where Murphy’s law prevails and everyone seems out to get you.

Waking up to the sound of artificial birds — he thought it made the rude awakening back to reality a little bit less gruesome — he lays in bed for a few minutes, thinking about how he has so much to do. So much that doesn’t matter. A quick prayer helps to rouse him from the sleepiness that hangs over one’s head when one hasn’t had as much sleep as one needs. He asks the Lord to help him be a better son, a better brother, a better employee — even though he keeps his job out of some compulsion to keep busy and not because of any real love for the work. It’s a short but powerful ritual in a world where everyone is free to build their own moral codebooks, even though no one is qualified to do so.

One of his favourite things to do is to observe the sky. The sky is the embodiment of wonder and awe: on no two days is the sky the same, but its beauty never diminishes. The way the cloud populates the vast, seemingly endless space feels just right. Sometimes the clouds seem low, almost within grasp, moving quickly as if tied to a jet engine. Other times the clouds are in perfect order, far away, almost in space; they seem deliberately planted there, not moving from the perfection in which they were placed. Even on rainy days, the sky never fails to lift his spirits.

But back to patience: if you look around too much, you’ll be convinced that everyone is getting what they dreamed of except you. To save himself from the pain of what could of and should have been, he packs his schedule with unimportant tasks and hobbies that make him feel like he is building toward something he desires — whatever that is. What he really needs is patience. Patience that everything is happening as it should. And faith. Faith that everything that he wishes for so deeply in his heart, everything that he dreams of when he lies on his bed, a bed one size too big for him, will come true.

It’s a shame that the modern man is so devoid of faith and patience — for in those two qualities lays the Kingdom of God. 

* Originally in Time Capsule #74